Heidssssss :)

The End of May - 25/5/12

Hello! I’m sorry for the lack of blog posts recently but with doing my GCSE’s an all I’ve been working really hard for these exams… As soon as the Summer arrives I hope to write blogs much more often :-) Although, Louise from ‘Sprinkle of Glitter’ always says if you’re not in the mood to write a blog post then simply don’t and I couldn’t agree with her more on that one. Anyway, I was going to write this post after I’d finished my exams completely but I felt like writing it tonight instead!

What I wanted to say is that this past week has taught me a few things, these things came from a place I never thought I’d agree with. School. Most of you may know my experience with school and everything and the fact that I had to go there to sit 3 exams this week was a huge thing for me. I mean I’m not going to lie, I was in a seperate room from all of the other pupils that were in a big hall with hundreds of people and was placed in a classroom with about 8 others instead.

I decided that I had to be careful and not get too stressed about the exams or entering school all over again as otherwise it would end badly. The night before my first GCSE (Tuesday) I was feeling nervous and a little apprehensive, yet when it came to the morning I’d been worried about I wasn’t all that scared. Well, not as much as I thought I’d be anyway! It was so, so strange to be in that environment again, surrounded by people in uniform, smartly dressed teachers and just the overall feel of the place. Having to wait for an invidulator to come and get me was probably the worst part because that’s when my brain started thinking all sorts of things but it was alright, I was collected and taken to the classroom of the exam.

For anyone that knows me well, especially my family, know that it was a huge achievement for me to even step inside a classroom there without freaking out. Not only am I pleased with myself for doing so but its taught me a couple of things:

1. That I should be ok with starting Sixth Form, as I was obviously worried it wouldn’t work out like before and,

2. If I can do that, there are so many other things I can do!

Onto a different subject but along the same lines, it kind of saddened me a little bit to see all of the Year 11 leavers pictures on Facebook when I logged on there this afternoon and a piece of me realised that I probably have missed out on a few things. After thinking about it for some time this evening I realised something else, that if I hadn’t of been off school then I probably wouldn’t be the person that I am today (ironic sounding I know!) but it really is the truth. I’ve met some amazing people and done things that I would have been unlikely to do had I been at school so I guess it all balances out in various ways.

Gosh, sorry this is such a long post! I just surprised myself by proving that I could walk into school once again and I’m going to be honest, I wouldn’t of minded staying longer and that is saying something!

Anway… Good luck to all the leavers! :-)

Thank you for reading and let me know what you think!

x x x x

Special people <3

Since I’m at Nanny’s house tonight and have easy access to Tumblr I thought I might as well write a blog whilst she’s watching Emmerdale. (Aww!)

I’ve just been thinking about those really important people that you meet in life and I thought it’d be a good theme for a blog so here goes… Its so strange to think that when you first meet a person you never truly know just how much you will grow to love them as a person and how much they will mean to you in life. This isn’t just me talking about a relationship, I’m refering to non-family members that end up meaning as much to you as real family members do.

Everyone that knows me personally will know that have been going with my Nanny to an 95 year olds house and helping her out, I can’t believe that I’ve now been going there for around 3 or 4 years now. My Nanny has helped her for nearly 20 years now! My whole family have ‘adopted’ Vera into our family as she has none of her own and over the years that I have visisted her, every Wednesday to be precise, I have grown closer to her. I now see Vera as a Grandmother type of role model to me and I love her dearly! You’re probably thinking this is a bit random but its because I’ve been missing her recently as she is in a nursing home for a little while because she broke her arm, the home practically know nothing. They’re forever telling us she’s coming home and then changing their mind which is really starting to annoy me and everyone else. What saddens me most is knowing how much she wants to go home :-(

Goodness me this sounds so soppy but its just what I’m feeling and thought I’d share it on here. Another thing, always, always show how much you love your family members and also appreciate the fact that you have them because it won’t be until you loose them that you really come to appreciate them. <3

Thanks for reading!

11th May: Thoughts.

Ah I wanted to write this blog so desperately that I downloaded the Tumblr app on my phone, handy!

Basically, I was watching a few of those ‘My secrets’ videos on YouTube earlier and found myself sitting there, watching the computer screen with tears in my eyes. Some of those people are so brave and I want to eventually make my own spin on one sometime.

When I watched video’s like those it makes me remember ‘my story’ if that’s what you’d like to call it and already having an emotional day for not much reason what so ever it didn’t really help the matter at all! Most of the people that follow my blog or know me personally will already know about it all so I’m obviously not going to dwell on it again in another post…

If you’re suffering with something, whether that being depression, anxiety or anything similar just remember that you are an amazing person who is going through a mental illness that a lot of people couldn’t deal with. Quite a large majority of these people (maybe even you) are going through this rubbish alone, just like I did for some of my experience. Honestly, I cannot stress enough how important it is to tell somebody, the sooner you do, the sooner you can get your life sorted and back to normal again. Living in that way isn’t really ‘living’ at all when you think about it.

All I wanted to really say is just a few basic sentences:

You are not the only one,

You are an amazing person,

And last and anything but least,

It will get better.

Feminism, girls need to stick together!

Hey bloggesphere! Long time no see but my laptop isn’t liking the Tumblr website at the moment for some reason…

Anyway, as you might have already guessed this blog is going to be about feminism and just how it affects us all - especially us teenage girls. If you know me then you’ll know only too well how much I love Amanda Holden and that name is the reason behind me writing this. The press have been making up a whole lot of rubbish recently about Amanda and Alesha being so called rivals and hating each others guts, this is completely untrue and I don’t understand why certain journalists should be allowed to make up lies just to sell their papers and magazines. I mean does the picture below include two people that look as if they want a bitch fight? I think no is the answer you’re looking for. They are in fact anything but, both being girly girls and sharing the same interests they have become good friends as well as a brilliant pair of judges on the Britian’s Got Talent panel.

A large percentage of these articles written that intend to turn us against one another are mainly women, which is quite shocking. Surely, a gender as powerful and strong as we are, we should all stick together as a large tribe?

The thing that makes me sad is that a lot of young teenage girls such as myself read these articles and believe a majority of what it is telling us, and people wonder why girls at our age can be so competitive towards each other! I think its definitely the wrong signal to be sending out to millions of girls out there. Unless of course, the fued between the two celebritie’s is true. (Which wouldn’t be too pleasant!)

I would love to be a journalist but there is no way I would go to the extremes such as lying about other people just to make a living.

We all choose that one person to look up to, and we want to follow in their footsteps and I am so grateful that Amanda isn’t one of these horrible, catty kind of women but instead she is a powerful, inspirational lady that I adore. I don’t think anyone could ask for a better idol than that. Let me know what you think!

Thanks for reading!

x x x x x x x x x x

Bugsy Malone - An Experience

Who would of thought that last September I very nearly didn’t want to join DOSYTCo? I remember the morning before the first workshop for new members, I cried with nerves and declared that I wasn’t going to go that afternoon. After thinking about it for most of the day I decided about five minutes before we were supposed to leave the house that I was going to just take a chance and go along…

You may have realised from other blogs that I tend to almost chicken out of a lot of different experiences that are new to me! Anyway, the show I was in with the local drama group is now over as it ran from 11-14th April. I can honestly say that I never thought I would enjoy myself on the stage in front of an audience as much as I did. The atmosphere surrounding everyone in the building, backstage and wherever else was unbelievable. The moment that I realised all of this was the finale of the first show, having the crowd applaud us all after our last song was such an amazing feeling! I remember looking at my friend and we both had tears brimming in our eyes.

As each night slipped by and another show was complete I realised just how much fun I was having and didn’t want it to end. The last show was absolutely incredible, we had the best audience yet and at the end when it was all over I couldn’t help crying, even if I was the only one! I think I got so emotional, not just because it had come to an end but also the fact that I’d been in my first show and had a very overwhelming experience - but in every sense a good one.

I can’t even tell you how pleased I am now having done the show, that I did take a chance and not look back. It was more than worth it and being in Bugsy Malone was an amazing thing for me to achieve. A lot of you will already know why, it’s because of all the anxiety I’ve suffered with over the past few years. Now knowing that I’ve finally overcome them in some respect and done something so big as this is such a great feeling! Thank you to DOSYTCo and all of the lovely people there for making me feel welcome and having a great first show :)

Thanks for reading and I’ll try and post soon!

xxx

Plucking up courage is worth it.

Hello guys! Long time no see I know, but I’m back and am using my Dad’s iPhone because for some reason my laptop won’t let me use Tumblr properly which is mega annoying but anyway…

I’ve actually named this post instead of just using the date because well, it just came to me and fitted the blog itself.

Basically, this is something I’ve been meaning to write for a couple of days and have finally got round to writing it now. So off I go and I hope you enjoy!

Looking back to around August 2011 and remembering a time when I first started thinking about joining ‘Zumba’ classes locally. I wasn’t entirely sure but convinced myself that it’d be fun and also keep me fit too. Waking up on the day of my first class I felt quite optimistic and unsure if I wanted to go.

It wasn’t until the last few minutes that I decided to go for it. (Remembering that this was my first ever out of my comfort zone activity) Iwas walking up to the village hall door and desperately wanted to turn back and walk away whilst holding back tears but stopped in my tracks, composed myself and plucked up the courage to go inside. I came out and couldn’t believe how much fun I’d had!

A couple of weeks later I was to start at our local drama group, again it made me extremely nervous and it was only a few minutes before I had to be there before I decided to go for it. Everyone around me and even my brain told me ”you thought the same about Zumba, but loved it in the end” and I knew they were right.

So, you might of already guessed that this blog is trying to say how amazing Zumba has been to me and how it has helped me in other aspects of life too.

Never did I ever imagine that one man’s classes could help me in the way they have and I’ll always be grateful for that. (Mr Dod!) they have given me the confidence and happiness that I never thought I’d get back again which has allowed me to do so many other things too. I’ve got my smile and sense of humour back at last!

This blog is a HUGE thank you to Mr Dod for helping me more than he’ll ever know :-)

And also a form of apology because I can’t take his scones that I promised him tomorrow… (explain tomorrow, don’t hate me!)

Hope you all enjoyed reading,
xxx

Looking Back - 17/3/12

Hello everyone! Long time no see I know but who knew GCSE’s could cause you so much stress and work? Anyway, I’ve been wanting to write a blog for a few days and thought I’d let some ideas build up in my head before doing so.

The title of this blog sounds a lot like one that you’d read at the end of a year or something but I’m doing it now because it feels relevant…

I can’t remember exactly what it was that I was doing the other day but it suddenly dawned on me how different my life is and how much it has changed for the better. I’m doing so much that I wouldn’t of even dreamt of doing over the past few years, I know you’re probably thinking that I always talk about this kind of stuff in my blogs but right now I really feel like I need to write about this :)

It’s just the small things, such as being able to go out for the day without the feeling of nerves in case I felt dreadful or panicky, seeing my friends like normal teenagers, and more than anything - just living a normal life and doing the things that I enjoy and taking opportunities, because I can! The feeling is great.

I’ve mentioned the fact that I now do Zumba classes and that I also attend my local youth drama group too but today I started extra tuition in Maths as it’s my weakest subject and my exams are coming up… What amazed me is the fact that before we left the house or even when I was walking to the place, I didn’t feel any nervous feeling or the usual like before. I was really shocked especially since the place is obviously educational and ‘school’ like! Another thing, darting back to the drama is that I’ve got a proper role now - with all of 4 lines and a few other bits. Being in front of an audience, speaking, acting and singing is something I never truly never dreamed of being able to achieve again.

My second photo shoot is also coming up for my Auntie’s collection (Peggys Collection) and I’m SO excited. The first one was an amazing experience for me and we all had a lot of fun together too! Standing in front of a camera, photographer and several other people is again, something I didn’t think would happen either.

So, basically I’ve just been thinking about a lot of things in the past and realised how unbelieveable my new lease of life really is. My experience is proof that things DO AND WILL get better, take my word for it. I want to scream out to show how happy I am about everything finally being around 90% (Maybe even 100%!!!) better than they once were, I try to enjoy every minute of every day now!

Oh and I’ll just add in that the song ‘What doesn’t kill you (stronger) by Kelly Clarkson speaks a lot of truth and I believe those words are true! I just want to try and help the people who are suffering with the past problems I had. Thanks for reading and I’ll try and post again soon!

Follow me on Twitter: @HeidiJackson_

x x x x

S+L

Speaking and Listening Drama – Radio Reporter

I’m here at the Olympic stadium inLondonfor the highly anticipated London 2012 games! From where I’m currently sitting in my commentary position I have a magnificent view of the whole place.

I obviously cannot start without mentioning the well known Olympic flame which has been carried by 8,000 inspirational people across the United Kingdomduring the Torch Relay. Their personal stories have the power to inspire millions of people watching around the world in many different countries. Torchbearers have carried the flame through more than 1,000 cities, towns and villages in the UKand its now back in Londonfor its performance throughout the games. The gold coloured aluminium torch stands 800mm high and has 8,000 perforated holes all over it to represent each inspirational story of every person that helped the Torch throughout its journey around the UKbetween May and July 2012. The last torchbearer has already lit the cauldron at the Olympic Games Opening Ceremony in the Olympic Stadium to mark the official start of the games and it will be extinguished once the games have finished.

Carrying the Flame

8,000 inspirational people across the UK will carry the Olympic Flame during the Torch Relay. Their personal stories will have the power to inspire millions of people watching around the world.

The London 2012 Organising Committee has now started making conditional offers to those with exceptional stories.

Find out more about who will carry the Flame

The brick-red running track weaved around in a never ending circle with the thick white striped lines almost glistening in the heat we’re experiencing down here! Then there’s the immaculate green central space for the field events that looks as if it’s just itching to be trampled on. The loud cheers and clapping from the vast crowd of 80,000 people is accompanied by the warm breeze that is slowly ruffling the flags of over 160 countries.

The upcoming event we are all waiting for is the highly popular marathon running, the audience is getting increasingly louder as we wait for the event to unfold and the excitement from everyone is creating such an amazing atmosphere here in the stadium. The competitors must feel an overwhelming pressure to do well hearing the hype that is going on before they’ve even made an appearance.

The construction of the stadium itself started in May 2008 and was finally completed just less than three years later in April 2011 when the last piece of turf was laid. It is the most sustainable and was built 75% lighter than any other in terms of steel. Did you know that an Olympic Stadium with such a large removable element and mix of permanent and temporary seating has never been attempted before? There are more than 700 rooms within this particular stadium and more than 30 buildings had to be demolished on the site to make way for the construction of the venue. Apparently so I’m told there is a hawk named ‘Willow’ that flies around the stadium to deter pigeons from nesting here, who’d of thought that one of the most least homely places like this would have an employed pet bird?!

My personal favourite sport to hear about is running mainly because of my Grandparents. My Nanny and Granddad were both great runners, especially my Granddad as he was part of the fastest marathon runner’s team inNorfolk. They both ran on a daily basis and absolutely loved it so whenever I watch a race it makes me think of the pleasure they must have had whilst taking part in different events.

The crowd is slowly descending into hush as the event is about to get underway, the runners are taking their positions on the track, putting their feet into the correct starting point 3, 2, 1 and THEY’RE OFF!

Heidi Jackson reporting for Look East at the London Olympics - 15th of July 2012

- (Hey Brodie! ;) )

My Inspiration <3

Speaking and Listening 5 Minute Topic

My female inspiration is Amanda Holden. Who in case you don’t already know is a household name across the country and also one ofBritain’s best loved personalities. Mainly due to her appearances in many popular drama series such as Wild at Heart, Cutting it and Kiss Me Kate. Amanda hit the big time in showbiz when Simon Cowell asked her to be a judge on the panel of Britain’s Got Talent – one of the biggest talent shows in the world, which is now coming up to it’s sixth series.

A lot of people ask me why I like her so much which, strangely is a difficult question to answer because I just simply do! I admire her strength and courage so much, especially over the past year. You might have noticed in the press recently that Amanda and her family haven’t had the best of luck but thank goodness they’ve now got their well deserved happy ending.

What amazes me most is how she can cope so well in the public eye which is where most celebrities crumble due to stress and the open door pressures that come with being famous. There will always be disrespectful people that hate and try to bring her down as with all widely known individuals. But Amanda just focuses on her fan base and doesn’t let them affect her. It frustrates me when people who have no knowledge on her whatsoever claim that she has no talent, when in fact she has been the leading role in two West End shows, the most recent one being Shrek the Musical.

Numerous things we all love about Amanda are her warmth, kindness and the way she treats fans such as myself. You’ve more than likely heard of the social networking site Twitter – which is one of the easiest and most popular ways to interact with those red carpet walkers that we all want to brush shoulders with! Amanda is constantly replying to the endless tweets she receives from us all on there which just shows how down to earth she really is. I have Twitter to thank for quite a few things but the main thing being that my idol knows of my existence.

I sat back to watch the Paul ‘O Grady Live Show last year because Amanda was a guest on the TV show that was new to our screens. Never in a million years did I predict what was about to happen… Fans had been able to send questions to her through the show online and I was lucky enough to have mine read out! Paul simply said ‘’we’ve got a tweet from Heidi’’ and Amanda instantly sat there and replied ‘’Heidi, Heidi Jackson?’’ as if we were best friends or something. Not everyone is privileged enough to say that has happened to them before.

Amanda, her husbands Chris also own a holiday home here inNorfolkbecause they love bringing their two daughters here to spend quality family time together. As you can imagine that’s a pretty fantastic feeling since I live here too!

So, I’m guessing this gave you an insight into why I look up to Amanda Holden. Not only is she beautiful on the inside but the inside matches and I shall continue to support her throughout her career.  

- Thanks for reading! Fingers crossed I do ok! :)